Next to Me
by LaurierRusee
Summary: *Songfic* *One-shot* Dean is an alcoholic, and every time he makes his Sammy cry, but Sam doesn't leave his side; ever.


**Disclaimer! I do not own the Winchester brothers, obviously. I just simply borrow them here and there for my childish amusement. Sam and Dean are NOT brothers in this little segment, and the song is Next to Me by Civil Twilight; a sidenote, it really is an amazing song! I hope you all like it!**

**You are my only escape, you are the reason that I wait; On the corner of this empty street I just can't wait to meet**

Sam sat, his back facing the headboard; looking at the small television as he waited up for Dean. This was one of the times where Dean drinks, stays out and comes stumbling home 4 in the morning. Of course Sam loves him, with his whole heart; he just wonders how long he can put up with the drinking, and the late night drunken apologies, and the vomiting, almost every morning. But he stays, right by his side, gently combing his finger's through the older's hair as he lay passed out in the bathroom. How can he leave when his heart is sleeping next to him in that motel room?

**There's so much a man can do, there's so much a man can say **

Sam found himself being shaken awake by a drunken Dean, his red eyes and tear stained cheeks. He's lying on the floor, hanging by his arms on Sam's bed.

"Sammy" His high pitched plea tugs at Sam's hear, and almost immediately have the boy in tears "I'm sorry, God Sammy! _I'm sorry_!" Sam shrugs off the blanket and crawls to the floor, to hold the sobbing broken down man. The one thing Dean feared was becoming like his father; a drunkard, who left his mother to raise a kid all on her own.

"Sammy" He was desperate "I-I love you, _honest_! You know I do!" Sam nodded, holding the head of black hair to his chest, as he tried to hide his own tears.

"_I know_, and I love you too" Sam hugged him close. Dean had come stumbling in many of times before with this, and every time Sam comforted him, because he believed him. When Dean drinks, sometimes all hell breaks loose, and it's not pretty; he wishes that he could just stop and give it up; because he'd do anything for Sam.

**See I have done so many things wrong, that you should have thrown me away**

Dean sat outside in his car, imagining Sam at the moment; packing all his things. He was never one to make a big show, Dean knew that; especially when he's angry. His salty tears stained his face, he'd shoved Sam into a wall. _A wall_! He couldn't even imagining slapping the boy the wrong way, or at all! He seemed to be doing a lot of that; crying, it seemed like all that he ever did was yell at Sam to his point of tears and go drink. He absolutely hated himself for it, for hurting his Sammy even though he promised that he'd never let anyone hurt his Sammy. He braved, and opened the car door; walking up to the motel door and unlocking it with a certain sway of unbalance.

He opened the door to a sleeping Sammy, who was lying in _his own_ bed. He was wearing a wife beater, and the circular purple bruise screamed at him. Instantly, he broke down; he hurt his Sammy, the one he loved and the one he promised to protect!

"Dean?" Sleepy-eyed, and his disheveled hair sitting wildly on his head, Dean shed his tears harder, and harder until his eyes and head throbbed to different beats. Sam stiffly got out of bed, grimacing as he leaned on his shoulder to much.

"I don't understand why you still stay with me. Why don't you leave after everything I put you through?

**I've got this second chance, I'm gonna take it; I've got this song and dance, I'm gonna take it**

Dean lay entangled with Sam in the sheets, his cold, outside hands wrapped around Sam's frame. Sam loved moments like these, where Dean was _sober_ and himself. The Dean _he_ knew was back, the one who'd stay up all night whenever he got sick; who always put a smile on his face whenever he was down; who'd fall asleep humming ridiculous songs.

"Sammy boy?" Sam chuckled at the old name, and hugged _his_ Dean closer to him. He could feel Dean's chest rising and falling; his heart beating to the same beat as his.

"Yeah?" Sam mumbled, Dean leaned over and kissed his head, stroking the long brown locks

"I'm gonna change, I'm gonna be better, for you and for me" Sam smiled, and looked up at his older lover

"That's all I ask" Sam told him, he smiled at the younger man, and placed chaste kisses to his lover's lips. Sam blushed a deep crimson red, even though he'd been use to this treatment plenty of times before.

"I'm gonna be sober, and we can go out like we use to; and actually have fun like we used to well besides work" Sam smiled, and kissed his chest

"Yeah, I miss those days" Sam mumbled, Dean kissed the head full of brown hair

"Me too"

**I've got all that I need, and I can taste it; I've got you next to me and I don't wanna waste it**

Sam lie pale, and almost shivering under the thick blankets. His allergies had gotten to him, turning his nose an ruby red and making his eyes water. His sneeze reverberated off the motel room's walls, as Super Hero Dean came to the rescue with tissues, soup, and his allergy medication.

"Dean, I can't feel my cheeks" Sam mumbled, Dean smiled at him before he sat down on the end of the bed. This was the normal Dean, and Sam could feel his heart flutter at everything he did; the gentle touches, and strokes, soft murmurs of comfort words followed by a string of words that made Sam's cheeks blush 10 shades of red. Dean carefully helped Sam take the allergy pills, and then laid down in bed with him.

"Because I love you" Sam murmured into Dean's chest

"What?" Dean was completely confused by what he said

"I said, because I love you" Sam laced his fingers with Dean's, holding on tightly to the older man "You asked, once why didn't I leave you ; and there's your answer" Dean smiled, kissing the head of beautiful brown locks.

"I love you too" Dean can see the difference already, between his sober and drunkard self. He hated that he drinks, that he goes out and comes back in all hours of the night and every time, _every fucking time_, Sam was waiting up for him. He wants to show Sam that he could change, Sam was all he needed, all he wanted and he wanted to make sure he didn't lose that.

**You are my only embrace, you are the light that lights my face; any fool would do the same, to follow in your trace**

Dean watched as Sam slept on top of him, his chest rising and falling; the sun's bright rays shining through the thin curtains and splashing onto Sam. His sandy brown tresses, shone giving him the appearance of highlights; the sun kissed his bare back giving the brown haired boy skin that radiated and glowed. This was the origin on his happiness, the main reason he woke up every morning with a smile on his face; because he woke up next to Sam.

Sam eyed the black-haired man as he trailed his every move. He said nothing, just following Sam and sometimes tickling Sam's waist with his fingertips. Dean carefully watched his every move, following his footsteps as he went from the kitchen to the bedroom and back to the kitchen; Sam laughed at Dean's knew strange behavior, and Dean couldn't bare to think of letting the boy out of his sight. Sam stopped short and Dean collided into him, not aware of the sudden stop. Sam laughed as Dean wrapped his arms around the slightly smaller boy, nuzzling his neck from behind.

**See people come and people go; and I know that I should've been replaced**

Sam sat in the booth, with Austin, talking, laughing, and smiling; Dean felt the strong urge to punch the bartender and drink until he throw up. Of course Dean could make Sam laugh, and smile and blush like that; be he could also put tears to the boys eyes, and yell and scream and make him feel horrible even though he never deserved it. But, he deserved it, Sam shouldn't never have to cry because of what _he_ yelled, or what _he_ said. Dean felt like shit, but as he looked over at Sam's glittering eyes; with _that dude_ Sam wouldn't have tears in his eyes by the end of the night. Sam was enjoying his new friend's company, but he just felt weird. Where was Dean? Sam's eyes carefully scanned the small area for Dean, and with no luck found him.

"Excuse me" Sam told his friend, and quickly got up and stepped outside to see the Impala, and a slump form in the front seat. Sam opened he door and slid himself in.

"Don't even think about it" Sam told him, grabbing one of Dean's hands that was damp from the few tears he shed. Of course he thinks that Sam shouldn't have to go through this, but the boy just won't give up on him; and that's how Dean knows he doesn't deserve him.

**I've got this second chance, I'm gonna take it; I've got this song and dance, I'm gonna take it **

**I've got all that I need and I can taste it; I've got you next to me and I don't wanna waste it**

**I'm gonna take it; All that I can get; I'm gonna take it**

"Sammy, dance with me" Sam laughed as Dean held up his arms and danced around the room to the radio. He snatched Sam away from his spot at the window, and hugged him closer to himself. Sam laughed as Dean waltzed him around the room, humming some ridiculous tune that Sam doesn't recognize. When Sam, actually gets to look into Dean's eyes he can see the happiness shining within his orbs. His bright smile, made Sam laugh; he wanted to stop and stare into his eyes for forever. Dean saw the happiness sparking in Sam's eyes, he loved it; he always loves it when Sam smiles. He has to stop, for himself, for his Sammy.

**It's beautiful the way you love, the way you take me back**

**Here she comes around the bend; she's coming to take me back **

Sam looked around the room, clothes lining the floor; broken glass, shattered pieces of other miscellaneous objects spread on the floor. Dean was in the kitchen, this had been one of the worst arguments they had ever had. He could hear every sniffle, every tear and every sob that the boy made. Dean bit hard into his lip, and began into the bedroom; little feathers were still shifting in the air from the pillow Sam tore and threw at walked over to the sobbing body, and wrapped his arms around him.

"Sammy, you might not believe me; and I don't blame you. I'm not gonna drink anymore" Sam looked at him, with hopeful eyes

"Dean"

"Sam, I am. Every time, there's a drink in my hand I end up making you cry and I hate myself for it" Sam broke his way from Dean's embrace, and grabbed the keys off the nightstand; making his way to the door; slamming it hard as he left. His breath hitched, as the door slammed, he was finally taking Dean's advice and leaving. After everything he did, he couldn't blame him; he had put the boy through so much already. His chances were up, and as much as Sam was like his breath, he couldn't ask him back because the same cycle would began. His eyes burned as it began to hit him harder, and his tears started coming down more; he didn't think it'd hurt this much. The front door came open, revealing Sam, and his eyes a intense red and his cheeks drenched in his salty tears. Dean's breath picked up.

"I got to the corner, the fucking corner" He mumbled, trying to make words for his feelings "and I just, just I-it, I can't" Dean jumped up as Sam ran into his arms. He could hear Sam's heart beating wildly against his.

"S-sa-mm-my" He wrapped his arms around Dean as the slowly stumbled down to the floor, his arms tightly around Dean. Of course they cried when they fought, but Dean never felt more heartbroken when he saw Sam leave out that door

"I'm not going anywhere" Sam kissed the wild black head of hair "even if I wanted to, I couldn't. I'd die before I made it to the door" Dean tightened his arms around Sam, this, this was the second chance. He promised, and he doesn't break promises.

**I've got this second chance, I'm gonna take it; I've got this song and dance, I'm gonna take it**

"Can I go first?" The instructor smiled at his new member, he nodded and Sam let go of Dean's hand. Dean stood and walked in front of the podium.

"Hi, I'm Dean" He was nervous, this was the first time he's done anything remotely like this ever

"Hello Dean" The group replied, he nodded

"And that's Sammy, _Sam_" He corrected himself, Sam smiled proudly at him "Hi Sammy!" Dean blushed deeply "and, I'm an alcoholic. My dad was an alcoholic, he died some years ago from alcohol poisoning, and my mother passed from a stroke. Sam's all I got now, let me tell you it's not easy for him" Of course he felt bad, he had caused a lot of pain to Sam, and now he's making up for it.

"He stays up all night, and I repay him by stumbling in and arguing till his breaking point. I mean, if you're in a relationship and your partner wonders and ask why you haven't left, you're doing it wrong" He chuckled, along with the small outburst of laughter from the group

"But he stayed put, holding me as I passed out on the bathroom floor. Dumping all the liquor in sight down the drain, and that one time you handcuffed me to the sink" Sam blushed as Dean laughed "And I love him for it. For all of it, and his ass. I mean, _have_ you guys seen it?" He smiled down at the blushing, _his_ blushing Sammy as wolf calls and claps for the man echoed the room.

"I haven't drank in two weeks. I mean, it's little compared to you guys and all; but it's a start" They clapped for the young man as he resumed his seat next to his lover, who held his hand tightly.

"I'm proud of you" Sam whispered in Dean's ear, pressing a chaste kiss to the boy's cheeks.

**I've got all that I need, I can taste it; I've got you next to me and I don't wanna waste it**

Dean watched as Sam threw the ball, and the small boy caught it, a string of insults trailing behind that.

"Jeez, tough kid huh?" Sam asked, Dean laughed causing the boy to whip around and glare at him.

"And you ain't doin no better than your boyfriend!" He teased, Dean smiled, and stood

"Oh, really?" Dean jumped up and chased the young boy around Sam, before catching him and lifting him above his head

"You son'a bitch!" Dean laughed as Sam chastised the young boy about his language

"Dean, we should get going" He smiled at Sam as he ruffled the young boy's hair

"Hunter, let's go. We gotta go see your mother and grandma" A few months ago, he learned he had a son. most likely during his free and wild period where he was rebellious against his mother.

"Sure thing Pops" Hunter ran and climbed into the back of the Impala, as Sam helped put on his seatbelt. He had never been prouder of Dean, he remembers crying tears of joy when Dean had a glass of scotch in front of him _untouched_.

As they pulled up in front of the graveyard, Sam parted ways with Dean and Hunter to find his own parents. Sam was raised by his godfather, Bobby; his real parents were killed in a car crash when he was younger. He smiled, placing the roses on their graves; if only they could see him now. He stood, and straightened his suit jacket, whispering loving words to the headstones and smiling.

"That's your grandma" Hunter wriggled uncomfortably due to the tie around his neck. He leaned over and put the flower his father gave him on the grave, as Dean did the same. His mother, would be proud of her son, throughout everything.

"_And_ that's my mom" Dean arranged for his mother, and Hunter's mother to be buried next to each other. I mean, what were the chances of him impregnating one of his high school best friends? They both placed the flowers on the graves, as Sam rejoined them.

"Ready?" Dean smiled down at his son, and put his arm around his shoulders.

"Yeah" Hunter began taking off his tie as he walked away "I want some pie" Sam and Dean laughed at the small boy. Clearly, he was Dean's son. Dean couldn't be happier, of course he was new to the whole parenting situation, but Sam's right next to him, helping him all the way.

**You are my only escape; you are the reason that I wait**

Dean had finally gotten Hunter asleep, after all the sugar _Dean_ had given him throughout the day was really catching up to the kid. Sam sat smiling proudly at Dean.

"Thank you" Dean hugged the younger boy closer to his chest

"That was all you" Sam told him, Dean knew that Sam was the reason he decided to be sober, because he hated doing what he did to him. A year, a whole year that Dean's been sober; and Sam still tears up at the thought.

"I love you Sammy" Sam laughed, he had always regarded Sammy as a chubby seven year old name; and whenever Dean used it, it made him smile

"I love you too Dean" All that he wanted, all that he needed was right here with him.


End file.
